The beauty of the return of our sunny fall days with cool crisp days is tempered by the memory that on such a day last year, we lost one of our treasured youth group members, Will Dickens. A 16-year-old Gunn High School student, Will had been serving as a St. Bede's Sunday School assistant and helping his parents, Janet Dixon-Dickens and Richard Dickens, and sister Alison with our coffee hours when he wasn't busy with water polo and other school activities.
His tragic death took all of us in his parish and school community by surprise, as so many noted at the overflowing memorial service held later that month. He will continue to be remembered at St. Bede's in several ways: * through the tranquility of the garden close erected in his name, next to the parish office; * through the bright flowers that bloom over his ashes in Jarrow Memorial Garden, where his soul and others' will be recalled on our annual Sunday after All Saints observance on Nov. 7; * through the private remembrances of his beloved family and friends, one of whom, Alex Braelow, joined Alison on our last service trip to Rosebud, S.D. * and through the reflections shared on Love, Loss and Healing, a blog created by Janet where friends, families and and parish members can comment on Will's life and impact on us. The Web address is http://lifelonglearning-l-cubed.blogspot.com/ (there'll also be a link to it on the St. Bede's Web site.)
It's painful to note that Will was not the first Bay Area student to die in such devastating circumstances, nor the last. So it's important to remember that all our youth group members need our care and support as they journey to independence in a complex and often fragmented world. It might also be helpful to be aware of the suicide prevention protocol called QPR -- "question, persuade, refer" -- recently taught to the staff and teachers in the Mountain View-Los Altos Union High School District . According an article about the training in the Mountain View Voice, "Students who contemplate killing themselves often feel pressured, depressed, overwhelmed or hopeless and very often suffer from a form of mental illness such as bipolar disorder or psychosis." But they may exhibit few of the classic warning signs: loss of interest in favorite activities, school or jobs; withdrawal; changes in eating and hygiene habits; declining grades; risk-taking behaviors and talking about dying. Some signs may be more subtle: giving away important possessions, showing extreme cheerfulness after depression, expressing bizarre or unsettling thoughts. When any warning sign is detected, the QPR protocol involves asking students if they are depressed and are considering suicide, attempting to persuade them against ending their lives and referring students to a qualified mental health official. As the www.teensuicide.us Web site notes, "In many cases, teens don’t know how to deal with their feelings and problems and are looking for someone to help them find assistance. Acknowledging these warning signs and seeking help for the problem, and offering support to a teenager who is working through his or her issues is very important, and can help prevent suicide." Here at St. Bede's, we can encourage our youth to connect with their community and one another in service and fellowship, to share our joys and sorrows openly with one another, and God, and to know they are never alone or without help. Our youth program year begins this month with a group outing to (and critical discussion of) the new movie "The Social Network" on Oct. 1 and a picnic trip to Bede's Bog on Oct. 23 for environmental stewardship. Every Sunday you'll also see youth serving as acolytes or Sunday School assistants, or joining you in the pews. Please take the time to let them know how much we appreciate their sharing of themselves with us. -- Jeanne
No comments:
Post a Comment