One step at a time, one foot in front of the other

Today is the 19th anniversary of our son, Brian Alexander's infant death. He was born on October 29 and lived for a day. His twin brother, Eric Richard, was born on October 30 and died on November 1. This time of year is very somber, one foot in front of the other, one step at a time. God has a plan for each and every one of us. KARMA is the word of the day for me. Often capitalized: defined as the force generated by a person's actions held in Hinduism and Buddhism to perpetuate transmigration and in its ethical consequences to determine the nature of the person's next existence. Life forces and nature, the sun rising and setting, God's presence in our lives with each of us having a purpose to make a difference. I live each day surrounded by Will's spirit. I am so grateful to have known Will here on earth. I continue the journey to find purpose in this life, to give back, to accept and appreciate what God has given to me. I am thankful for my family, friends and live my life with love, honesty and integrity in my heart in peace and harmony with the universe for the good of all concerned.

Recipe of the day:

Richard's Yorkshire Pudding
1 scant cup of flour
1/2 cup of water
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup of milk
2 eggs
oil

Combine ingredients, whip it, refrigerate for 1 hour, remove whip again until bubbles appear. Place 1/4 inch of oil in muffin tin. Place tin in 400 degree pre-heated oven to heat up oil for 3 or 4 minutes, remove, distribute pudding mixture evenly across muffin tin. Cook for 10 minutes, remove, drop temperature to 350 degrees and cook for 20 minutes until muffins are golden brown.

Fall 2011-October

October 19 will be the 2nd anniversary of Will's tragic death. Fall used to be my favorite time of year. October was especially my favorite month. I still want fall to be my favorite, it is very difficult, now. Perhaps, eventually...
We just got back from attending a wedding in England. It was a fairy tale wedding at a very old church at Elvaston Castle County Park in Derby. Proud parents (Richard's cousin, Andrew, and his wife, Helen), proud bride and groom, Fran and Rich. We were honored to share in their wedding day.
Then off to Sheffield to visit more relatives, ah the love of family, thank you! Hiked the Yorkshire Moors-Herriott country then off to London to see plays. War Horse was our favorite.
We hear of many changes happening at St. Bede's. We look forward to stopping by when in town to visit, attend church, just "be" in Will's garden among nature with his spirit ever so present there.
On my commute to San Francisco, I take the ferry from Vallejo, I journal. Have been writing in the same journal since Will died. Reading it, brings back so many memories, so much of the journey. Here is an excerpt:
May 21, 2010-Will's 17th birthday
"Visited Bede's after dropping Aly off at school, the Trinity kids were going to chapel. Will, your spirit was with them. Giselle was awarded your Adopt-a-College scholarship in the amount of $2000. She will go to USF next year and wants to become a Spanish teacher. The program is wonderful, we will donate in your name every year and follow the kids through college. I love you so much and miss you, Will. Mom

We went to Max Christiansen's celebration of life today at an Episcopal Church in Belmont. Max is the father of my nephew -in-law-Justin. His grandfather was an Episcopal priest. Max, an inspiration, we loved him dearly, We will miss him. Key take always-gratitude, thank you dear God for Will in our lives as Max inspired us all to love, care, engage. What he is teaching us about life- Reminds me of the impact we have on each others' lives. Keep close and loving each other. We love you, Will, we miss you here with us. Changes at St. Bede's soon, will talk later. luv mom

Help Reduce High School Student Stress

What Can I Do To Reduce Student Stress at Gunn?
You are not alone. Many parents and students are taking action to reduce the cycle of competition, isolation and depression. Join us!
1. Come to the Next We Can Do Better Palo Alto Open Public Meeting, 7:00 PM, Tuesday, May 17, at Cubberly Community Center, Classroom A-6
2. Join our facebook group http://www.facebook.com/groups/wecandobetterpa

3. Send an email to the Board of Ed and Superintendent Skelly and Principal and Site Council of Gunn:
"I support the implementation of a teacher advisory program for Gunn students. Every PAUSD student should have equal access to availability and quality of counseling resources. Adding advisory would address both the guidance and connectedness 2011-12 focused goals. Please act now to implement a teacher-advisory system for Gunn High School."
email to: kskelly@pausd.org. kvillalobos@pausd.org, Site Council : magnons@pacbell.net Linda Ling

Gunn Parents
• 33% were either unsatisfied or very unsatisfied with “counseling services.This number is twice as high as the comparable number from Paly.
• 32% were dissatisfied with availability of academic counseling.
• 14% were dissatisfied with availability of psychological counseling.
• 34% were dissatisfied with quality of academic counseling
• 16% were dissatisfied with quality of psychological counseling.
• 40% feel that their child did not receive “effective college counseling”
Paly Parents
• 16.5% were unsatisfied or very unsatisfied
• 14% were dissatisfied with availability of academic counseling
• 9% were dissatisfied with availability of psychological counseling (compared with 14% at Gunn)
• 19% were dissatisfied with quality of academic counseling
• 10.4 were dissatisfied witih quality of psychological counseliing (compared with 16% at Gunn).
• 19% feel that their child did not receive effective college counseling.
Data from the 2008-09 Western Association of Schools and Colleges (WASC) Accreditation Self-Study Report Surveys 45% of Gunn students state that they do not “know who to talk to to access support services.” (personal counseling, health issues). (question 47, http://gunn3.pausd.org/~info/wasc09/GunnWASC_Chapter1.pdf)
78% of Gunn students state that they would support advisory period (question 56). (http://gunn3.pausd.org/~info/wasc09/GunnWASC_Chapter1.pdf)

Spring 2011

It is now spring, March was very wet. Today is April 1st, the sun is shining, expect temperatures to be in the 80s. Since my last post, life continues with its ups and downs. The pain of grieving is difficult yet necessary. Thank goodness for dear family and friends. I am working with a group of people in Palo Alto called "We Can Do Better Palo Alto - Reducing Student Stress in Palo Alto Schools".

The first organizational meeting is Tuesday, April 19 · 7:00pm - 8:30pm

Location
Cubberly Community Center Classroom A-6
4000 Middlefield Road
Palo Alto, CA

This is the first organizational meeting of We Can Do Better Palo Alto. We are a group of parents, students, former students, and concerned citizens of Palo Alto California working to reduce academic stress in the PAUSD schools.

We are currently working collectively to pressure the Palo Alto Board of Education and the administration of PAUSD to implement Section P-8 of the Project Safety Net suicide prevention plan, which requires the district to "study, discuss, and implement" district-wide strategies to reduce academic stress.

All are welcome to attend the organizational meeting. Agenda items will include introductions, reports on work done so far and on recent meetings with the superintendent and Board of Education members, outreach to potential community partners, and organizing for upcoming efforts and Board of Education meetings.

All who are interested in working on the issue of reducing academic stress and implementing P-8 are welcome to attend and participate. Please join us at this meeting and invite your interested friends and neighbors.

If you have questions, feel free to email Ken and Michele Dauber at kenneth.dauber@gmail.com. We hope to see you there.

As 2010 comes to an end

It has been very difficult for me to post this fall especially after October. I try to keep my spirits up and hope for answers. There is such a void in my heart for Will to be with us here physically-that will never be. Up until October 2009, 2009 was a very good year-I can remember every month with Will,Aly, Dick and the rest of the family and friends. Good times, no great times then October-what happened? I never saw it coming, I would do anything to turn back the clock to make it not so-that will never be. 2010 was a year of many additional changes and distractions rebuilding a life, a family minus our Will here with us to love, dream, make memories and fulfill wishes for a future after high school graduation-a lifetime as an adult. The plans all up in smoke now, gone, everything we wanted/he wanted fades into the background. It is sad getting college literature addressed to Will wanting him to go the "their" University. He would have made an excellent student-such talent all around; a beautiful person, so much to give. All I can say now is that he attends ALU (Afterlife University). I am thankful for those I love and love me and will continue the journey to find answers to help educate the community and myself in 2011. Now looking to the future to the Spring when Will would have graduated from Gunn-working on another Athletic scholarship and Adopt a College scholarship. Let me know if you would like to make a donation in memory of Will's life. I don't think that I will be able to attend the graduation ceremony this Spring-maybe...Another focus for the Spring and next year is helping Aly with college prep. She likes the change from Gunn High School to Foothill Middle College very much-The program and curriculum suit her. I am so proud of Aly, she inspires me every day especially in how she is dealing the grief and loss of her older brother, Will, her best friend. She has her moments as we all do and takes each day at a time. Wishing you all peace and love in 2011.

Fountainbleau Cheesecake

Here is the recipe for the cheesecake. The only thing changed was adding a shortbread crust. The original recipe (below) does not have a crust.


Ingredients:
2 lbs cream cheese (preferably Philadelphia brand), at room temperature
1 1/2 cups sugar
4 extra-large eggs, at room temperature
3/4 cup half-and-half
1 1/4 tsp vanilla extract
Juice and grated zest of 1 large or 1 1/2 small lemons


Preheat the oven to 425 F. Generously butter a 9-inch springform pan.
Beat the cream cheese in a mixer at medium speed until light an fluffy, about 5 minutes. Add the sugar and beat until it is completely incorporated. Beat in the eggs, one by one, scraping the bowl after each addition, waiting until one egg is completely incorporated before adding the next. Beat in the half-and-half in a thin stream, followed by the vanilla, then the lemon juice, and lemon zest.
Pour the batter into the prepared springform pan. Wrap a single piece of aluminum foil around the outside, bottom, and side of pan. Place the pan in a roasting pan. Add enough very hot water to come about halfway up the side of the springform pan. Place the roasting pan in the oven and reduce the heat to 350 F.
Bake the cheesecake until the top puffs like a souffle, about 40 minutes. Remove the cake from the oven and let rest for 20 minutes. Leave the oven on.
Return the cheesecake to the oven and bake until set and slightly puffed, about 20 minutes more. Jiggling should be minimal. Remove the cheesecake from the oven and let cool to room temperature. Refrigerate the cheesecake until completely cold, at least 6 hours, but preferably overnight.
Dip a sharp slender knife in hot water and run it around the inside edge of the springform pan. Unmold the cheesecake. Cut it into wedges for serving, using a sharp slender knife or dental floss stretched between your hands. (If using the former, wipe if off and dip it in hot water between slices.)